Thursday, November 15, 2007

Beer Review: King Cobra

Anheuser Busch King Cobra Premium Malt Liquor

I found myself in the capital of all things economical and tasty. Good ole' Newark. Immediately I was bombarded by the temptations of Fried Chicken and White Castle. Knowing that I had a request from Bogart for me to do a review of some shitty beer I quickly seized the opportunity at a local liquor store and for $1.29 I picked up King Cobra. I knew this beer would be a piece of shit that would likely ruin my day but I never knew just how much. I later poured this monster into a glass (I know I am breaking 40 laws but who the fuck polices this shit!).

The head was large from the beginning but quickly went into a thin layer with no lacing. Next to no aroma on this one, the only thing I get is the smell of sticky movie theater floor. I taste the first drop and the only thing I can taste is a shit load of malt with no hops. AB could really tell me they used no hops for King Cobra because they didn't want to slow me down and I would have no problem believing them. Compared to other 40s this one isn't as bad as some will get (Mickeys!) but it isn't good by any stretch of the imagination. At least steel reserve has more alcohol to make up for its horrible taste. I don't know why anyone would drink this. If you are on a budget buy Steel Reserve. Do your future a favor!

Final Score: 20% (Do I smell Shit? Oh, thats my life.)

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

true i drunk 4 of these and was half nude pissing in someones backyard climbing through windows and robbing pizza deliverly men. they tase bad but after i finish the first on i cant even tell anymore and gee the price tag is alouring only 1 dollar in my town

Anonymous said...

I spent the best part of a month living in a motel in San Diego with two of my mates from England. Very early on we discovered the joy of King Cobra. The joy being it got us dangerously smashed for very little money and, in turn enabled us to escape the world of cheap motels and fly away to a land of dribbling, arguing and $1 tacos. Lovely. If only we had it in England

Anonymous said...

The Cobra is the best bar-primer ever for college. Go ahead and knock back a 40oz for a buck, and you'll spend much less at the bar later getting f'ed up.

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